Posted by: spotchie on: October 23, 2008
a little. An interesting conversation last night sparked something that I hadn’t really thought about in a long time…. friendship. I can count my close friends on one hand…three fingers at that.
I come to realize in last night’s conversation that I don’t really have friends. The friends I did have were those that needed someone to be strong while they figured things out. And when they were done figuring things out while anchored to my port, they sailed away so to say. Do I not know how to have friends… I’ve always been this way with people. Just a select few, I open the door to let them in. Others, I play this role of confidant, support, teacher, etc. whatever you want to call it. It’s some kind of detached role. Hmmm… Are these people the one I care more about?
Posted by: spotchie on: June 30, 2008
Well today was definitely not a productive day. Woke up with a bad migraine. I think it’s the weather. It was really hot last night and when I woke up it was still hot. I sometimes feel my head is like a barometer. I can tell when the weather is going to be yucky…my migraines come out. I could definitely live without migraines.
Tourist might like the weather outside. But I find that it was hot and humid. The air felt real heavy. Perhaps this is why my head is hurting so much. Lack of oxygen. ha ha ha.
I worked on the background for the PSA. It’s up to my brother to add animation now. I also found the music and worked on the script. Huh, I guess I was a little productive. We’ve only got 3 full days left to get at least the beginning clips done. I’m not sure if we’ll get it done. I’m getting a little bit stressed. Well hopefully we’ll get it done.
Posted by: spotchie on: June 28, 2008
Well I’ve decided to take a huge risk and enter a PSA contest. Never done a tv commercial before, only print stuff. So this is definitely going to be a challenge. I always felt that doing a commercial would be much easier because you’ve got time to work with….not like a print work where you’ve gotta capture the essence at one moment. But I’ve having a difficult time deciding the direction. The deadline for the contest is on July 9th. I’m wondering if we’ll make it….I hope so.
Thank goodness today is Friday and I’m exhausted from the constant thinking about the PSA. Looking through inspirations and trying to gather momentum to get things started is taking a toll.
Posted by: spotchie on: June 26, 2008
I think I received one of the best advice from an article I read on Behance. Michelle Haimoff, president and founder of ThePanelist.com gave some thoughtful advice. Her major advice in nutshell is “you gotta do what you gotta do to get whatever done”…which is right on.
I mean alot of us today grumble about what we have to do….well we don’t have to do anything, if you think about it. We can get fired, lose our home, lose the things we love. But if these things are important to us, we gotta do whatever it takes to keep them, right. Simple enough.
I took an Educational Psychology class which really put alot of things into perspective during that phase of my life. I was 25 at that time. And my life was a huge mess. I think the mess I made would have taken an average human being their entire life to experience, but I instead took 25 years. I had to do some major major damage control. But as you can see, I survived.
I know it’s hard to be introspective if your world around is crashing in….it’s easier said than done. But why must we live in hindsight…Why can’t we be better able to stop and re-assess the situations we’re in. And perhaps make better choices. I don’t regret anything in life, I learned from my choices. They made me who I am today.
But if wasn’t for the advice given to me during the Educational Psychology class which happens to echo what Michelle Haimoff said, I think I’d still be a mess.
Posted by: spotchie on: June 23, 2008
For most of my life, I was searching for something stable. Something that would give me the security I felt I lacked. Now that I look back it was more about my insecurities and that I wasn’t supposed to be looking outwards but inwards.
At 20, I wanted to be like everyone else. I wanted to get married, so I thought, get a good job, have kids, etc. But what did I know at 20. All I knew back then was that I was different from most people I grew up with. That I thought differently, I had different aspirations which often times excluded me from conversations. It never really bothered me until my best friend picked up and left me…for a guy. This is when everything came to a screeching halt. And I knew I was alone.
So I began questioning everything…searching for answers…looking. I don’t regret choices I have made in the past, it has made me who I am today. But I wonder sometimes had I not gave in to “normality” and just went about my merry way, where would I be today.
